I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
