Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize