Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
