IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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