nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
