she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
