She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
This is classic penis vs brain.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
