glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
