I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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