He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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