do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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