it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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