..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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