Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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