I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
