thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
