North Korea, Best Korea!
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
