Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
