We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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