i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
