so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
