Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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