I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
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