Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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