am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
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