I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
you win again, gameday.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
