I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
