oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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