Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
God, I missed his penis.
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