come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
