bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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