My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I want to make a zoo with you.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
