If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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