Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
