i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
