It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
