My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
