Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
