Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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