KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize