it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
