So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
