Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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