Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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