3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
