Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
