we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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