Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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