it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
