Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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